busy

someone said to me last night, after hearing what i have been up to these days, "you sound busy". To which I responded, "Yes, I am".

However, upon reflection, after a night's sleep, a beautiful long late breakfast with my wife, and working in the garden for an hour and a half, I would say, "I disagree, I am not busy, I am full. I am deeply in love with life. I feel the pulse of life and all of her moods coursing through me- love, anger, fear, passion, joy, compassion, curiosity, excitement, enthrallment and all of the others. All of them. And I want to do ever so many things because my love draws me to them! Singing, plant medicine, cooking, eating well, body work, working in the little shop I do, reading, praying, making beauty, working outside in the garden, growing plants especially vegetables and fruits, washing, spinning, dyeing wool, knitting, making fiber out of nettle and silk and cotton. walking outside in meadows and mountains and along streams and rivers, meeting with friends, going to concerts, plays, museums, visiting family. Practicing Tai Chi and Chi Gong and maybe Kung Fu. The list goes on and on. But I am not busy. I may be in perpetual motion, or even trying to do too many things. but I am not busy. I am full, totally completely in love and full with life and I want to experience it all. And I am afraid that I won't have enough time to do all the things I want to do and go and eat and play and dream and grow. How does a person choose? How does a person move forward into fullness, held, loved, caressed by life and brought into her potential, her power, her gifts that only she can, in her unique way, give?"

That is what I would say to the person now. I am not busy, I am in love.